Is it real yet??

So it's my turn to reflect on what it was like...most of you know that I was feeling a bit frazzled in the week before we left. I had started a new job just two weeks before and I was working like a million hours. We were overwhelmed with the fact that we had NOTHING for the baby at the point when the agency called us to match--so my good friends Sarah & Shannon stepped up to take me shopping for a couple of outfits--and then Marnie took me on the first serious look at things like cribs and car seats. I must admit, it all felt surreal.

Even the night we were driving to the airport to fly to Guatemala City seemed strange. I had worked all day, we loaded up all the luggage (it took four suitcases for less than 40 hours in the country!!), and headed to Portland. We had a celebration dinner at McCormick & Schmick's in Portland, and then off we went to the airport. We checked in at the Delta counter got our boarding passes, cleared security, sat at the gate, and stared at each other. "Does it feel real yet?" "Nope," we both agreed.

But how real it felt when we were there in Guatemala, holding our new son. He was absolutely perfect in every way. All the hours that we had spent memorizing the first pictures we had seen of him were tossed out, because now we had him in our very own hands--staring up at us with these very big brown eyes.

I think Matt & I were both scared that Mateo would be unsure of us, and maybe even cry at first...but there was none of that. In all the time we spent with him, he cried for three reasons: #1) I'm hungry, #2) There is something wrong with my diaper, and #3) I'm tired. The cure for #1 was easy (he eats 4-5 ounces every 3-4 hours). The cure for #2 was straight forward (although Matt still needs a bit of coaching about how tight to put on a diaper). The cure for #3 was an Eddie Bauer Front Pack (thanks Sarah) and a binky (thanks Marnie). Exactly three minutes in that and he was out like a light.

So you can imagine how our time was...sleep, eat, poop, sleep, pee, eat, sleep, etc...and every minute of it was glorious! The first night, as we were crawling into separate beds, we looked at each other and said, "Yep, now it's real." How blessed are we to have such an awesome experience to carry us through the weeks until we see him again.

We're planning on heading back about Easter time for a visit, and then Matt will probably stay for language school. I'll come home to work and go back a month later for another visit, and maybe, if we're lucky, we could be bringing him home shortly after that.

Keep checking back here...we will post more pictures from our time down there for your viewing pleasure. In the meantime, keep Mateo in your thoughts and prayers. All our love, Sarah, Matt & Mateo.

On Being Three

We flew a red eye down to Guatemala this weekend as a couple, and though just two people boarded the plane to Portland, we came back a family.

We've been watching "Adoption Stories" on Discovery Health these last few months, and the climax of each episode, even if it happens in the middle, is the day the new parents meet their new child. Usually it's the day they take them home. We felt fortunate that Guatemala is one of those countries in which the process is run such that families can take this step long before the actual legal adoption, displacement, and flight to another country. But that didn't make us any less uncertain as we boarded the plane. The exhilaration and aprehension of those "adoption stories" meetings, and agency caveats on the possibility that we could be met by our child as any stranger might be, merged with the realization that in a few hours someone we'd never met would come to our hotel and trust into our care for two days a child they'd fostered with love.

If you're one of the friends to whose children we have read the kids' adoption story "Over the Moon", then you'll know what I mean when we say we were like the parents in that book:
"...until finally they arrived and went to a hotel to unpack. Then they hurried and scurried about, getting ready for their new baby. 'Soon, soon. Our baby will be here soon,' they told each other as they waited." In fact, less that three hours after our plane hit the tarmac we had Mateo William in our arms. In the meantime we unpacked half a baggage allowance worth of clothes, bottles, toys and books into our room's dressers and shelves, and the hotel brought us a crib and a thermos of boiled water for formula. I was coming back into the hotel from a visit to the ATM when the desk staff told me guests were in the atrium(early!) Sitting there were a teenage boy and a woman with a baby in her arms. It took a moment for them to realize I was who they were waiting for, and for me to realize that neither of them was the interpreter the agency had arranged for. Then the woman said "William" and held up the child whose photo we'd been looking at these last three weeks. I looked away, stammering "uh...ehm...mi esposa" and pointing to our hotel room, reluctant to hog for myself this first full gaze at our son.

We were back in a minute, and as we held him in turn, we got to know Mateo and his foster family. Filomena is 41 and she and her husband have four young adult and teen children. Her oldest is married, and she helps Filomena with Mateo in the mornings. Her son Harrold, just finishing school, escorted her to the hotel. Elementary Spanish got us throught the initial introductions until Sonia, the friend of the couple who run "Journeys of the Heart", and our interpreter, showed up.

We got a wonderful sense for Filomena, and her affection for Mateo was plain. Sonia also considered her to be among the best foster mothers. In fact, Filomena had fostered 15 adoptive children before Mateo, the longest for 1 year, and talked about how emotional it can be to say goodbye to them. She said she begins praying with and for each child, as soon as she gets them, that they will get a good and loving home. Mateo, born at 11:20 pm, was in her care the very next morning. So the transitions he's had to deal with have been less difficult than for other children.

We spent time asking about his routine: sleep, feedings, how she soothes him - everything we could think of. He actually already sleeps 8pm - 1am, then till 5am, and finally till 8am. (We'd imagined a lot more awakenings). We got some of his formula, ordered more from a pharmacy (delivered by a motorcycle courier) and were left a bottle with formula and his accostomed nipple (from our copious selection we were able to find some that matched well!) We showed Filomena and her son a soft board book we'd prepared with pictures of his new extended family and friends, and which we would leave with him. We also left her with a token gift of thanks and a card in Spanish for her, and one to our son explaining that we'd call him Mateo William as he joins our family, since by then our match seemed meant to be, and Mateo/Matthew means 'gift of God' (you knew that, right? I mean, just look at me...) We were lucky to get good translations. Sarah wrote the text, then handed me the babel fish web translation. I cleaned it up some, but realized it was left with a lot of literally-translated idioms completely cleansed of their meaning. Fortunately the wife of a college buddy was able to translate for us at the last minute. Being from Guatemala herself, she was able to put our meaning and emotions into not just the correct language, but the correct cultural context as well.

We'd expected papers from the lawyer decribing our right to be in custody of Mateo, so we could go out together and justify the presence of this baby if stopped for some reason (there are members of official-dom who have a distinct dislike of foreign adoption - or even adoption in general.) But the request had been misunderstood and all we got was Filomena's papers, so we would have to stay at the hotel - but they had a restaurant, and we liked the idea of a safe, static and controlled environment, for him and for us, so we decided 2 days of cabin fever would be just fine. Then Sonia, Filomena, and her son left.

And all of a sudden we were Three.

All for now... (what, did you think we'd give it all away at once?) Check back soon for Sarah's installment on what it was like to suddenly be parents.....

Look what showed up today...

Matt called me at work today and said, "You have to look at your email right now..." So I opened my email and saw the most wonderful sight. A beautiful baby with dark brown hair and the biggest dark brown eyes in the entire world. Meet our son, the future Mateo William Miller, an angel from heaven, who we will go to see for the first time in person in about 10 days.

We leave for Guatemala on the red-eye flight on Friday, February 17th (we go from PDX to Atlanta then to Guatemala City). We'll arrive about noon on Saturday and then get to spend just over 48 hours in Guatemala visiting our son. I imagine taking as many pictures and video as humanly possible in 48 hours!!

In addition to the pictures we take on our visit, we should get updates on a fairly regulary basis from our lawyer with new pictures...so check back often for the latest and greatest.

A new addition to our family

It seems unbelievable. Matt & I "matched" to a six-week old baby boy on Friday. This means we have been chosen to be his adoptive parents, and we are beginning the formal process to bring him home from Guatemala to live with us.

So some background first, just before Christmas, Matt & I submitted our paperwork to the Citizen & Immigration Services Office in Portland. We had been told that the Portland office was quicker than most, but that the average wait to get an approval to adopt is 2-3 months. In the meantime, we have been working on getting all of our documentation (called dossier) ready
to go to Guatemala. Everything has to be notarized, then verified by the Secretary of State where it was notarized, then authenticated by the Guatemalan consulate serving the state where it was notarized. Needless to say, we have our own Fed Ex account to get all the documentation taken care of.

Well, thanks be to God, our approval letter showed up on Thursday (a mere five weeks since we submitted it), and we were so overwhelmed--in shock really. So on Friday morning, Matt called our agency, Journeys of the Heart, to report that we had actually received our letter, and they were amazed at how quickly it had happened. Then the Director of International Programs, David, got on the phone with Matt. I saw Matt's eyes get big, and he said, "Wait a minute, I have to put you on speaker phone so that Sarah can hear this."

So once he was on speaker phone, David said, "We got a call from one of the lawyers we work with in Guatemala this morning and she has three baby boys available for adoption, one of which is a six week old. We think he would be a perfect match for you." Needless to say, we were stunned. Actually, we couldn't really even speak. David said, "I realize you must be in shock and if we need to we can pass on this time and wait for the next child." We were both like, "No, this is clearly the child God wants us to have."

So David contacted the lawyer in Guatemala and got some basic information about our baby sent up. He was born on December 15, 2005 with the birth name of William Aquino Castro. His birth certificate lists that his mother was Hilda Esperanza Aquino Castro, 36 years old, whose occupation is a house keeper. He had a well baby exam on December 20th which showed him to be 6 lbs 8 oz, about 19 inches long, and in perfect physical & mental health.

We decided to accept the referral which means we have "matched" to this child. Matt & I will chose an additional name as his first or middle name (to join 'William', given by his birth mother) , and that will be the name we call him by. We are flying to Guatemala City to see him for a few days over President's Day weekend (and to take as many pictures as humanly possible during that time). Right now, he is in foster care, and we should have opportunity to meet his foster family while we are there. This will be the family that will care for him during the six to eight months that it should take to finalize the adoption. The length of time it takes to finalize is dependent a number of things, including how easy it is for the Guatemalan lawyer representing us to schedule appointments for meetings with the social worker, doctors, birth mother and civil servants, and especially upon which beaurocrats' desks our paperwork lands on. Please pray that the process will be smooth and worry free for us.

We expect to bring home our son sometime in late summer--we will only get about a week's notice to appear at the Consulate in Guatemala once the adoption is final. We will of course send pictures as soon as we have them, and we'll update this blog with news about our growing family.

More news to come as soon as we have it, Sarah & Matt